Thursday, 17 October 2013

Late to the Meme Party!

I have seen this meme on everyone's blog. figured it must be my go.:)

The phone rings, who do you want it to be? My son who lives away, I miss him so much.

When shopping at the supermarket, do you return your trolley? Yes I do, I need my pound back.

In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? I can be both but I do talk a lot!

Do you take compliments well? No , definitely no I really don't.

Are you an active person? Hello, dance teacher here, ( actually I would love to just sit and read all day, my job makes me active).

If abandoned in the wilderness, would you survive? Again no not a chance.

Did you ever go to camp as a child? Nope , I would have hated it then just as much as I would now.

What was your favourite game as a child? Board game would have to be Yahtzee, I loved my dollies though.

A sexy person is pursuing you, but you know he/she is married, would you? No I would not, and believe me in my job ,all that close dancing I do everything in my power to  give off no signals ALL the time.

Are you judgemental?   Yes I think I am

Do you like to pursue or be pursued? Neither now I am VERY happily married. I would have preferred to have been pursued in my younger single days.

Use three words to describe yourself? Hardworking, kind and boring.

If you had to choose would you rather be blind or deaf? What a horrid question( no offence to whoever wrote this meme)  Deaf. If I couldn't read I would be desolate.

Are you continuing your education? No thanks I am too lazy

Do you know how to shoot a gun? No, not the foggiest idea.

How often do you read books? Every spare minute I have.

Do you think more about the past, present or future? At the minute it is the future, we are worrying about how we will ever  be able to afford to retire.

What is your favourite children's book? Any Enid Blyton adventure or maybe The secret garden or maybe the chronicles of Narnia or.......

Where is your ideal house located? In the country.

Boxers, briefs, thong, panties or grannies? Knickers preferably from Marks and Spencers. I am English after all!

Last person you talked to? My lovely old Cat.

Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Yes of course, how else do get passport photos?

What are the keys on your keyring for? Our car, our home, my mum's house.

Where was the furthest place you travelled today? The next town.

Where is your current pain? Oops bad question , you don't want to get me started, it would take up too much space, I am riddled with it today.

Do you like mustard? No.

Do you prefer to sleep or eat? Sleep

Do you look like your mum or dad? My maternal grandma actually.

How long does it take you in the shower?  Ages at the moment because it helps the pain

What movie do you want to see right now? None I am not a film person.

What did you do for New Years? Snuggled up with my husband, it was his first year off work for ages, normally we are frantically texting in between his jobs.

What was the cause of your last accident? I fell down a flight of stairs at the school I work in. Most embarrassing as I had  student with me and she was frantic. I bloody hurt myself too apart from feeling an idiot.


Thursday, 3 October 2013

Freedom of Speech? Not in this House Babe...

Things have been quite quiet since arriving home from our lovely Mediterranean Jaunt. We are back to work and caring for the oldies, all of whom didn't miss us one little bit I might add! I have only had one spanking since holiday and that was more due to the stress of homecoming than my general naughtiness so all has been  well  in our teeny corner of the English countryside.

Yesterday I was a little bit, shall we say, testy or maybe temperamental, or even downright annoying. At least in my husband's (he who is always right) opinion that is. I suppose I knew that I would not get away with my wonderful attitude for ever but gosh you would think I could have lasted a bit longer without retribution than a measly couple of days. I truly thought he was too busy too notice my mutterings and sneaky gestures and general cheekiness.

This morning over breakfast, I informed hubby that I was going to run some errands for my mum and step-mum and he very calmly answered

Not yet you're not. We are busy

No we're not, what are you talking about?

Funny girl, you know exactly what we are doing. Are you showering first or after? Your choice  but you better get moving.


Silenced, I slunk off to the shower. When I arrived in the bedroom, he wasn't in evidence but he had laid on the bed his chosen implements,  a leather paddle, our new toy ( show ya later) purchased on a giggly whim in a tourist shop on holiday, and the bleeping wooden paddle :((
This is where I made a teeny weeny mistake


                                  I hid the paddle



I pottered about and hubby appeared, saying nothing about the mystery of the missing implement, although he couldn't have failed to miss it as it his favourite. I just got the  the usual orders to get into position.

I obediently leant over those lovely pillows he had so kindly placed at the end of our bed and awaited my fate.

I see the paddle has done a disappearing act,  no problems, I think the crop (nasty, black, stingy, always leaves marks) is about due an airing.

I do hate that thing and it very rarely comes out so finally the penny dropped, I was  really in for it.

Okay wife, why are you here this morning? (accompanied by a few, far to hard to be starting off with, smacks)

Because you are mean? ( See how my mouth just runs away with itself)

smack ,smack,  smack. Try again babe. Wallop

Okay okay, ouch ow. I was a little bit mouthy, maybe a bit  cheeky.. Ow ow ouch

A bit? Too much of everything I reckon, too many gestures, too much cheek, too much attitude.
Also and I believe you made this a rule to help you to remember. You forgot to turn the heating off AGAIN.

The spanking continued, for a while, with much wriggling and jiggling and kicking ( got a nasty mark on my leg from the new implement cos of those kicks :(((   )

Do you think you could refrain from the attitude and the smart remarks, do you think this will help. I hope so.  No more smart mouth!!

What happened to freedom of speech?    OUCH No No, not the crop .God that hurts......


Freedom of speech, he laughed, laughed I am telling you. Never heard of it, especially in this house.

Infuriating man.

Can I change my mind about ttwd. because my a** is really hurting and you are annoying me. (Still squirming, was this spanking ever going to end?).

Not a chance my sweet. You brought this dd malarkey to me and here it stays. Love you babe.

Oh, well can you stop for today, I am really really sorry. I will turn the heating off, I will be good. love you too.  Please please.........

Eventually after a lot of spanking, a little cropping (Sorry I don't know the technical term) and a bit of giggling with the don't know what, I was suitably repentant  and hubby was appeased :)


Gosh it's lovely afterwards. I love him, he loves me. I don't want to stop  dd ever, he doesn't either.
We are getting the hang of it. Generally I wish he was stricter, it's the lecturing I need, he wishes I was naughtier ( no chance for a while, I am rather tender at the minute), so plod on we will.

Now as I mentioned earlier our new implement.  Whilst on holiday in a little Italian souvenir shop look what we spotted at exactly the same time. It was  wooden kitchen implement shaped like a little long paddle. it is very cheerful, painted with lemons. Hubby took a picture of it resting on my rosy cheeks  but as you can see I refused to inflict that picture on you so here is the innocent thing all on it's own.





I doubt very much if it will last long as it is fairly flimsy. I have no idea what it is actually for but it came with a tea towel so it is kitchen orientated . Any ideas?


 I hope everyone in Blogland is well and happy. Hope you all have a good week.

love Jan.xxx


P.S. Mick has finally blogged if  you are interested. About time too sir.  x